


Thoughts of a Dying Augment

by sliferthegaydragon



Category: Terminator (Movies), Terminator: Dark Fate
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Lesbian Relationship, Everyone Is Gay, F/F, Gratuitous sex because why not, Movie: Terminator: Dark Fate, Romance, Shhh let people write porn, Time Skips, Time Travelling Lesbians, timeline spaghetti
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-03
Updated: 2019-11-18
Packaged: 2021-01-21 08:29:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,191
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21296528
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sliferthegaydragon/pseuds/sliferthegaydragon
Summary: Grace is dying.Dani lives.Flashing back through seminal moments in their lives we ask: How did it come to this?
Relationships: Grace & Dani Ramos, Grace/Dani Ramos
Comments: 54
Kudos: 301





	1. The end.

**Author's Note:**

> There'll be roughly 9 chapters. It has a happy ending, promise.

Grace can hear fighting, scratching, metal scraping.  
  
She knows they’re nearby, but it sounds far away in the distance.  
  
Flashes of red interrupt the darkness. Grace can’t tell if her eyes are closed or open.  
  
The digital interface in her retina strobes and glitches. Flickering like a flame about to be extinguished against the force of the wind.  
  
The pain is almost gone. Grace lets herself hope. Maybe it’s a good sign? Maybe her injuries aren’t fatal. Maybe it’s just her augment kicking in.  
  
But she knows. It’s all over.  
  
And she’s scared.  
  
There had been many times. Many times Grace had wanted to die. Wanted to stop, to escape. But not since Dani. Never since Dani.  
  
She didn’t fear death, and so she didn’t fear anything.  
  
But of course, she did.  
  
Because the only thing worse than death would be living without Daniella Ramos.  
  
Except here she was.  
  
Dani was alive and Grace was dying, failing, wilting. And Grace’s biggest regret was not living alongside her.  
  
_'Don’t you dare die.'_  
  
Of course that was easier said than done.  
  
Grace had shown every card she had. Nothing was left.  
  
Without her life, what was there?  
  
“Grace!”  
  
It’s Dani’s voice.  
  
“Grace!”  
  
The voices sound so far away. Muted, almost as though she’s underwater.  
  
Is she underwater?  
  
Her limbs feel lax, light. Weightless. Feels as though she’s moving.  
  
“Just hold on Grace.”  
  
Hold onto what, Grace wonders. When you’re floating through air, what is there to cling to?  
  
“Just hold on.”  
  
Grace has to strain to hear her voice now.  
  
A moment later she forgets to listen. The quiet comfort of nothingness swelling and filling her senses.  
  
Grace is forgotten.  
  



	2. The promise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A nihilistic teenager discovers meaning in a chance encounter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Important note: This used to be chapter 4. Chapter 2 and 4 have switched.

Grace took small pleasure in being agile. She’d always been a stumpy kid, but now she was catching up, ‘growing like a weed’ her dad would have said.

She effortlessly hopped across a gap in the concrete roof, looking back in satisfaction. Last year she wouldn’t have dreamed of attempting it, let alone clearing it. She shook out her lanky legs, this was worth all the aches and growing pains.

It wasn’t even about the survival any more. No, Grace lived for this. Was it an advantage? Well sure, adults just couldn’t climb the way she could. Wouldn’t takes risks the way she did.

Grace smirked, satisfied that she had lost her pursuers. She balanced leisurely on the edge, enjoying the pointlessness of the game. She gazed impetuously at the sharp drop on one side, challenging gravity.

She skipped along the crumbling wall, almost losing balance when her foot caught an irregular protrusion. That was the disadvantage of a growth spurt. Her brain couldn’t adapt to her body quick enough and it made her clumsy.

Grace decided to take a break, dangling her feet off the edge of the drop, digging through her bag to survey today’s loot. 

Tins, two foil vacuum packs, and — incredible! Chocolate! Grace crammed it in her mouth without a second thought. If she didn’t eat it someone else would only come and steal it from her. 

She chewed idly, becoming bored before she’d even swallowed the last mouthful. 

It was disappointing actually. She had hoped the guys had put a little more effort into chasing her. But she didn’t blame them, travelling anywhere was a danger. Most people just found themselves a den, and stayed there. Waited for the machines to come and kill them in their sleep.

Grace scoffed. It all seemed pointless to her. Killed by a machine, by a human. It was all the same, and it was all inevitable. Everyone else had died, why shouldn’t she? Mothers, fathers, brothers. 

What did it even mean to die? To be alive? Why did it matter?

So Grace stubbornly lived, not for them, but simply because it felt right. The wind in her hair, the pounding of her heart, tightness in her chest when she finally ran herself to exhaustion.

What else was there?   
  
Someway off in the distance, a faint roar rumbled out. She was exposed here on the roof, and Grace didn’t want to stick around for an air patrol. Not while there were still walls to climb and gangs to steal from.

Grace swung down from the ledge and through an open window the floor below. Her feet never reached the ground.

“Gotcha, you little shit.”

Grace thrashed in the arms of the stranger, kicking and flailing against him.

It was no use. Her light frame worked against her here; she hadn’t got enough strength to fight a fully grown man.

“You’ve gonna give back what you took.”

“And then some.” A third man added, flicking out a switch blade and brandishing it menacingly.

“Time we taught you a lesson, ain’t it?”

Grace relaxed in her captors arms as her mind raced and her breath caught up with her.

Her feint paid off and the man’s arms slackened for a moment, relaxing after the exhertion of holding her steady.

In a split second Grace had made her move. Her teeth clamped down hard on the man’s hand, and with every ounce of strength she broke out of his grip. 

She slipped out of her backpack straps as he made a grab, and in one swift movement she had taken off.

“Little fucker!” A chorus of dissatisfied cries rang out all at once, and in the time it took for the mob to coordinate, Grace was out of there.

Sprinting wasn’t her forte, but she had a lot of practice. Her long legs carried her swiftly, as her mind calculated possible escape routes. 

Finally hitting the ground floor, Grace could taste freedom. She was almost there! 

Grace spotted a wide crack in the floor. It would certainly buy her time while they climbed or diverted. Filled with childish bravado and overconfidence, Grace sped up. 

She was sure she could clear that gap. 

Well, 50% sure. 

Well, there was a chance. 

If she didn’t take it, she was dead anyway. 

Over-focussed on the jump, Grace never noticed the unevenness of the floor until her foot clipped something, sending her skidding out along the floor.

Grace lay prone a moment, letting the shock sink in. She could hear footsteps. Near and far. Thundering of the machines patrolling the sky, growing closer and closer. 

Grace’s limbs twitched with urgency. She needed to move, to run but she couldn’t even breathe, it felt like all the air had been knocked out of her lungs.

Steps sounded. People shouting. Scuffling.

After long minutes, someone stepped over Grace, prodding her with one shoe.

Grace cracked one eye open, breathing roughly. She could only see a silhouette, and braced herself for whatever was about to be done to her.

The shadow didn’t move, didn’t say anything.

“I’m not afraid of you.” Grace spat out.

“Well maybe you should be.”

“Just kill me. I’m not afraid to die.” Grace would, potentially, have been more convincing if her voice wasn’t breaking with emotion.

“Oh chica.” The person crouched down next to her. A woman’s voice. “Dying is the easy part.”

Grace looked past the woman, checking for any sign of those chasing her.

“They’re gone.” That soft voice again.

Grace’s eyes flicked over to her face. Warm, brown eyes gazed back. Something in Grace’s brain clicked, and her cheeks flushed with heat and attraction.

“My name is Daniella, you can call me Dani.” 

Dani’s head flicked between the vantage points in the building, with a sharp expression.

“Hey listen, we need to lay low until the coast is clear.” Her voice was calm and controlled, but Grace sensed the underlying urgency. “Can you get up?”

Grace tried sitting up, her whole body feeling bruised and achy.

“Come here.” Dani scooped her up in both arms.

“You should eat more! You’re lighter than you look, kid.” 

Grace frowned at Dani’s tiny stature, irritated about being picked up and spoken to like a child.

“You’re stronger than _you_ look.”

Dani let out a surprised chuckle, despite straining to get them to safety quickly. 

She planted the skinny teenager down in a secluded corner. There was enough visibility for them to keep an eye on the ongoing patrol, but not enough that they were exposed. Dani cleared some rubble to make room for her to sit down next to Grace in the little alcove.

Dani rummaged in her pack, bringing out a few supplies. 

“Here, try this.” Dani handed her some “It’s no MacDonald’s, I know.”

“Does it at least come with a toy?” Grace quipped, accepting the offering.

Dani let out a hearty laugh, infectious enough to make Grace smile along too.

“You are hilarious you know.” Dani’s words put a little colour on Grace’s cheeks. “I wasn’t sure you’d get that one. How old are you?”

“Eighteen.” Grace lied, but couldn’t maintain eye contact under Dani’s sceptical gaze.

“Mmmm. Yeah right.”

“I’d say you’re…” Dani looked Grace over, weighing her reasonable height against her childish facial features. “Sixteen? Fifteen?”

“Fourteen.” Grace blushed again, both at the attention and the implication that she seemed more mature than her years.

“And where are your family?” Dani asked tentatively.

“Gone.”

Dani nodded slowly, offering a thin smile that didn’t reach her eyes.

“Mine too.” Dani found Grace’s arm and squeezed it reassuringly “You’ll find more.”

When Grace was finished eating, Dani brought out her toolkit.

“Okay kid, let’s look at those grazes.”

Dani got to work, tenderly cleaning out the scrapes on Grace’s arms. Then moving to treat the ones on her face.

Dani hummed softly as she worked. Grace couldn’t recognise the tune, but something about Dani’s voice made it seem homely and familiar.

Grace stared ahead at Dani’s face, where a slight frown of concentration sharpened her soft features. Grace examined every detail: the little strands of hair that had fallen from her plait, and dangled on her forehead; the chocolate eyes looking up from under a sheath of long lashes; pink lips, slightly parted.

Grace’s mind reached back, stretching for a memory. Struggling in class, unable to focus because of a preoccupation with her teacher’s soft hands, sweet perfume, and melodic voice. Why did this always happen to her?

She mentally compared, trying to fit the pieces of the puzzle together. Was it the quiet confidence, the overt kindness, the surprising strength? Maybe a combination of her attributes as well as her physical characteristics.

Dani was so admirable. Grace needed to be her friend. Badly.

Grace had the sense of something being spoken, and wrenched herself back into reality.

Dani just stared back, the corner of her mouth quirked in an an amused smile. 

“Where did you go?” She teased “Sure you didn’t hit your head?”

Grace forced a laugh, mind still swimming.

“What’s your name by the way?”

“It’s Grace.”

“That’s a lovely name!”

Grace shrugged. Her eyes caught sight of Dani’s clothing.

“Are you a soldier?”

Dani chuckled esoterically. She reclined against the wall, staring out of a crumbling hole in the building walls. 

“Something like that.” In the distance, it was possible to catch glimpses of the patrolling machines.

“Have you ever killed one of those?”

“You know I prefer to think of myself as the man behind the curtain.”

Grace frowned.

“What curtain? You’re not a man.”

Grace’s eyes flicked to Dani’s chest and got stuck.

“Ah, too young for that reference.” Dani busted up with laughter. “Well that’s not what I mean. As in, my skills are in helping other people achieve their potential.”

“Oh.” Grace finally tore her eyes away “Can you help me?”

“You want to be a fighter?” Dani gave her a sad look, brows forming a crease between her eyes.

“I want to help. Like they do.”

“I’m sure you will one day. But you gotta know how first. Have you ever fired one of these?” Dani pulled up the side of her shirt to indicate her concealed weaponry.

Grace shook her head.

“Get trained up then, Grace. It’ll save your life someday.”

“I want to save yours.” Grace stared into the distance.

Dani looked over without reaction.

“That’s how it works.” Grace’s voice was more confident, determined. “You saved me, so I will have to save you.”

“Will you now.” Dani leaned back again, a wry smile taking over her whole face.

“I promise I will!”

“I believe you!” 

They sat a moment in silence, listening hard for any signs of activity outside. It seemed like things had passed.

“Listen I need to go back soon. Do you have somewhere to stay?”

“Nowhere wants me.” Grace snapped back, a wave of guilt washing over her as soon as the words were out of her mouth.

“Don’t worry.” Dani was unfazed. “I know some people. If you work hard and keep your head down, they’ll look after you.”

Grace nodded in acquiescence.

“Ready, Grace?” Dani shouldered her pack and offered a hand.

Grace reached up, feeling a tingle run up her back as their skin made contact. 

Together they begun to make their way across the debris and out of the building. After they reached level ground, Dani’s arm dropped, expecting Grace to let go. 

Grace looked away, her sweaty hand still gripping onto Dani’s.

“Can I see you again?”

“Of course.” Dani squeezed Grace’s hand. “I'll visit as much as I can. Besides, how can you save my life otherwise?”

Grace beamed and, for the first time in many years, warm rays of optimism begun to shine inside her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These chapters are absolutely definitely in an important and meaningful order and not just the order I wrote them. And in no way is this fic is just a convenient device for me to write about whatever unconnected incidents I want.
> 
> Anyway, I deeply appreciate all your comments. You are *chef's kiss* beautiful humans.


	3. The differences

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How could someone be all the same, and all so different?

The sun beamed in through the windows. Relentless. Merciless. In the backseat of the stolen sedan, Grace shifted restlessly.  
  
Even in her half-conscious state, the light irritated her photosensitive eyes. These augmentations had been designed for the dark and the dusk. The pitch black. And the world which dwelled under the black clouds blotting out the sky.  
  
She wriggled again, unable to muster the co-ordination to shield herself from the light.  
  
A second later, the sharpness disappeared and Grace could relax.  
  
As she drifted in and out of consciousness, Grace could swear she felt warm fingers against her skin. Checking her wounds and dabbing her forehead with a damp cloth.  
  
One time the car had hit a bump, wrenching Grace awake.  
  
Where were they?  
  
The last thing she remembered was raiding a pharmacy. And then? Then what?  
  
Grace stared across at the ceiling, surveying the interior of the unfamiliar car.  
  
A little tingle ran up her spine when she looked up.  
  
Dani.  
  
The harsh light of day was beginning to fade, and Dani’s rich skin was bathed in red and golden tones. Grace stared, transfixed by her features.  
  
The Dani who was all so different, and the Dani who was exactly the same. Like hearing a recording of your own voice. Everything is familiar, and yet all you can focus on are the differences.  
  
The softness of her jaw, the flawless skin. The make-up, smudged a little from the day’s adventures, but no less effective at bringing out the brightness in her eyes.  
  
Grace tried to speak, but all that came out was a low groan.  
  
Dani’s gaze snapped down from watching the sunset, locking with Grace’s.  
  
“Is the light in your eyes again?” Dani cupped her hand, casting a shadow across Grace’s brow.  
  
Grace coughed in reply, the tickle in her throat causing her to sputter and heave.  
  
Dani swore and grabbed under Grace’s arms to pull her more upright.  
  
Now finding herself pinned to the seat under the hybrid’s weight, Dani’s other arm flailed helplessly towards the water that was just out of reach.  
  
“Sarah?! Ayuadame! A little help?!”  
  
“Oh you don’t wanna drink from that one, darlin’.” Sarah snatched away the canteen Dani was reaching for, before tossing back an unopened bottle.  
  
“Then again, maybe it’d do her some good. Loosen ‘er up a little.”  
  
Dani ignored her comments, spilling liquid across the both of them as she rushed to bring the water to Grace’s lips.  
  
Grace gave a weak cough and panted for air after chugging down water. She felt Dani’s chest heave too, and Grace’s sensitive ears could hear her heart beating.  
  
Grace relaxed, feeling her body become weak again, and knowing it was moments before she’d be drifting out of consciousness. She tried to express her appreciation, again managing no more than a incomprehensible groan.  
  
“You saved my life today, chica. Rest.” Dani purred, cradling Grace’s head against her chest.  
  
She strained to look into Dani’s eyes. Grace was falling, winded. And Dani was there to catch her.  
  
She had never been so desperate not to rest in her life, but her body was failing and her consciousness evaporated into blackness.  
  


* * *

  
Grace flexed each of her fingers, cracking her knuckles and testing her grip.  
  
She was almost back to normal already; the medication was taking effect.  
  
Despite her irreverent attitude, Sarah’s estimate had been conservative. It was taking Grace longer than usual to regain control of her body. But she was getting closer.  
  
In the sink, Grace ran the water. Her wounds were healing well, but keeping them clean was a struggle in all the sand and desert. She rolled up her top to check the fresh cuts on her stomach. They had already sealed over. Excellent.  
  
Grace’s eyes scanned over every pit and scar. To her they were a point of pride. Each one told a story, spoke of a sacrifice made towards Grace’s main purpose in life. Dani had seen it differently. How many times had they argued about such things?  
  
Grace felt a lump in her throat at the thought. She splashed a little cold water on her face and stared at herself in the mirror. That hadn’t helped.  
  
She turned away, disgusted at her reflection. This was no time to be emotional. In the doorway she could observe Dani asleep in the cramped motel bed.  
  
Grace’s retinal interface scanned, returning information about the sleeping girl’s physiological state. She looked so peaceful, and yet her brainwaves told another story. A nightmare?  
  
Grace slipped over to the window, performing a reflexive safety check.  
  
A whimper from the bed behind her.  
  
Grace turned, finding herself staring down at the sleeping woman, eyes washing over every feature, every detail.  
  
Who was this person?  
  
Was this the same Dani that Grace knew?  
  
_Had known._  
  
Reality was beginning to sink in. The future was gone and there was no going back. Grace would never see Dani again, not that Dani.  
  
Suddenly she’d never felt more alone.  
  
Grace felt like a child again - lost, scared. Only this time there is no Dani to save her.  
  
“I miss you.” She whispered to the quiet room.  
  
“So much.” She choked out, swiping the hot tears from her eyes.  
  
The silence and darkness was oppressive.  
  
Responsibility for the whole world rested on her shoulders. Responsibility for this helpless human sleeping before her.  
  
Grace gazed over at the Dani who wasn’t Dani.  
  
“What am I going to do without you?”  
  


* * *

  
Sometime in the night, Grace jerked awake.  
  
She sat up from the floor, peering over the edge of the bed. Dani was curled up on the other side.  
  
Grace didn’t need to see her face to know she wasn’t sleeping; diagnostics confirmed it. Breathing irregular, heart racing.  
  
She padded over to where Dani lay. Glassy eyes tracked her as she came into view.  
  
Dani let out a pitiful sob. Grace’s heart clenched at the very sound. Dani Ramos did not cry.  
  
“Bad dream?”  
  
“Bad reality.” Dani retorted sullenly.  
  
Grace shifted uncomfortably on her feet. “Do you need a drink?”  
  
Dani took a breath as if to speak but only shook her head, and kept shaking it.  
  
Grace fetched some water anyway.  
  
“You can sleep here.” Dani scooted back a little. It was more of a request than a statement, Grace perceived.  
  
Grace lost track of how long it had taken for Dani to fall asleep in her arms. Grace didn’t care. It made her feel strong. Being needed, wanted.  
  
“I wish I knew how to protect you.”  
  


* * *

  
The sun was still yawning on the horizon, the breeze still on the cool side of comfortable.  
  
Grace completed her circuit of the area, finding Sarah still asleep in the car when she returned.  
  
She stood at the door to their room, knocking a second time. Had Dani fallen back to sleep? Her fingers rested on the door handle, wondering if she should let herself in.  
  
She peered in through the dirty window. Through the curtains, scanning the room for any sign of organic activity.  
  
If she wasn’t in their room, where the hell—  
  
“Trying to catch me changing?” Dani’s voice behind her made Grace start.  
  
“No!” At that moment Grace cursed that her augment toolset did not include the power of invisibility.  
  
“It was a joke,” Dani pulled a teasing face “But maybe if you ask nicely.”  
  
Grace swallowed, something fluttering in her stomach hearing Dani’s laugh, seeing the mirth and joy shining on her soft features.  
  
“Breakfast?” Dani pressed some warm package into Grace’s hand.  
  
“Where did you get this?” Grace peeled back one corner experimentally.  
  
“Gas station at the corner.” Dani gestured to the hut a few hundred yards away.  
  
“You shouldn’t—”  
  
“I know, but you weren’t around, sooo…” Dani grinned, unapologetically.  
  
It was nice to see her in such a good mood again. Her infectious cheeriness was easily in Dani’s top 10 qualities. Maybe even top 5, Grace ruminated.  
  
Grace chewed her food mechanically. What even was this, some kind of burrito? It managed to taste too bland and too sharp all at the same time. Still, it was ten times better than rations.   
  
“So did you figure it out yet?”  
  
“What?” Grace mumbled around a mouthful of burrito.  
  
“How to protect me?”  
  
“…”  
  
“Well, we’ll work it out.” Dani reached forward “You have a…” She swiped at a spot of sauce on Grace’s face.  
  
For a moment, time slowed down. Grace could barely withhold her feelings, too many to parse them. In the best way possible, Dani made her feel like a little kid. A time before stress and pain, when silliness and optimism were as natural as breathing. Something twinkling in Dani’s eyes sparked warmth in the pit of Grace’s stomach. It made her feel loose, tingly all over. Floating, and yet also more grounded.

There was no doubt in her mind. This was Dani Ramos.  
  
Dani reached down and wiped her hand on Grace’s top with a cheeky smile.  
  
“Shotgun.” Dani was gone, waking Sarah as she piled into the car.  
  
Grace stood frozen to the spot, overwhelmed. Eventually Dani wound down the window and poked her head out.  
  
“Come on, slowpoke!”  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mackenzie Davis would make an amazing Dread Pirate Roberts. I can't stop staring at this photo https://media.broadway.com/photos/large/8.199199.jpg


	4. The cadet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A not-so average day in the life of Commander Ramos.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Important note: This used to be chapter 2. Chapter 2 and 4 have switched.

Daniella Ramos sipped her coffee. Once upon a time she would have retched at the thought of drinking such dregs. There was little pleasure in the burnt and bitter fluid. Course grounds, probably used a dozen times before. But the water was almost fresh, something which was a privilege in itself.  
  
The coffee was the least of her worries.  
  
Dani sighed at the pile of papers to her left. No matter how many she went through, it seemed there were always more. She was cut out for field work, not to be caged in an office for hours on end.  
  
‘Office’ was a misnomer too. She jokingly referred to her headquarters as ‘the dungeon’ and there was no doubt that she was the one getting tortured.  
  
She pinched her tired eyes. How long had she been working today? What time was it? Sometimes she wished she had a window to gaze out of. Even if they weren’t 100ft underground, there would be nothing to see. Nuclear desert, ruin, scorched earth and blackened sky.  
  
Okay forget the window. Maybe she could find some kids to draw a mural on the wall. Would the children even know what trees looked like? Perhaps if she ever got a moment to herself she could learn to paint—  
  
The door valve span and the heavy door to Dani’s office screeched open.  
  
“Commander?”  
  
Dani snapped back into reality.  
  
“Thanks Corporal. Bring him in.”  
  
In was ushered another one of the new recruits. The soldier stood woodenly at attention across from Dani’s desk as the door creaked and slammed shut again after him.  
  
“I should get that oiled.” Dani commented idly while she dug through her stack to find the correct papers, squinting down at the file.  
  
“Okay then. Private Grey. Service number: 493-394-9220?”  
  
Dani took the silence as confirmation.  
  
“Let’s see what we have here.”  
  
Dani’s pen flicked down the report file, scanning for any pertinent details.  
  
Typical background info, pre-war childhood, later orphaned, found scavenging, brought into camp, yada yada. Nothing new here.  
  
Dani frowned at the date of birth, doing a quick calculation. 19 years old. Dani shook her head.  
  
Special operations was no place for children. She’d seen enough headstrong kids too eager to lay down their young lives for the honour of protecting the collective. What she needed was adults. People with a cool head and the self-preservation to recognise when a mission was comp’d.  
  
What good was it to raise the minimum enrolment age? To demand several years in service, when boys like this ended up slipping into the recruitment process anyway.  
  
Before her tired mind could spiral off into a fantasy of firing her lieutenant, her more rational side kicked in.  
  
“You’re terribly young to be enrolled in spec ops. But I can’t argue with these commendations.”  
  
Dani leafed through the boy’s service record. Success after success. His training record was exemplary, there was no doubting his skill as a marksman, nor as a tactician.  
  
Intending only to scan, Dani became engrossed in a lengthy description of his achievements regarding a surprise attack during a routine supply run. Another detailed his success evacuating the population of an isolated conurbation with not a single casualty.  
  
This wasn’t just a physically able soldier, this was a thinker; a leader. Dani mentally un-fired her recruitment scout.  
  
Despite her mind being made up, Dani flicked through the remainder of the file. Enrolled in basic training at 15, captain in Junior Ops by 16. When the war broke out, Dani was 22 and hadn’t even touched a gun, but years later now there were children who had been practically raised on the battlefield.  
  
“Your record is extremely impressive. Leadership qualities like these are rare with Junior operations. You could really move up the ladder there.”  
  
Dani continued: “Spec ops is the most dangerous work there is. Average service is a year, maybe two. But I’m guessing you know all of this.”  
  
Dani made a show of stalking around her desk territorially. As much as being confrontational wasn’t her nature, it was also her job to make damn sure these kids could step up the plate. It was a fine balance to finding someone who had the courage to think for themselves and stand up to her, without needless contrarianism and disobedience.  
  
She perched on the corner of her desk, folding her arms.  
  
“So tell me. Do you want to die, Private?”  
  
“No, sir.”  
  
At the soft pitch of the reply, Dani’s head shot up to regard the soldier on the other side of the room. It was hard to tell from the way the boxy khakis fell off that skinny frame. Lanky arms and legs so long that the mop of golden hair was practically grazing the ceiling.  
  
Dani glanced back down at the first page of the file. Female. Grace. How had she missed that?  
  
She bit back on making a comment, partly to avoid offending the girl, and partly to cover her own blunder.  
  
Dani had been so ready to interrogate this poor recruit, but now she was feeling her resolve soften. Yes it was almost 2030, but the military (or what passed for one) was still a boy’s game. Dani would give all the fresh coffee in the world for a little more female presence in her life.  
  
But the objective part of her mind also knew it was unfair to apply her own wants and biases, especially when someone else’s life hung in the balance.  
  
“Then why would you choose to enlist?”  
  
“I made a promise.”  
  
Had it have been any other recruit Dani’s eyes would have rolled out of their sockets. How many hundreds of times had she heard that? But there was something in the way it was spoken, as though there were some undertone Dani hadn’t quite perceived.  
  
“To who?” Dani kept her voice steady. Not vulnerable, but not commanding either. Just Dani.  
  
“You, sir.”  
  
As the words hung in the air, the soldier’s eyes dropped from where they had been obediently fixed on the back wall.  
  
Dani felt a little crackle of electricity when those intense blue eyes met her own. Bright and refreshing, like ocean waves breaking over her.  
  
Commander Ramos vanished, forgotten. Dani hopped down, coming toe to toe with the stranger in front of her, recognition finally clicking in.  
  
“Grace.” She reached out to brush some floppy blonde hair from her face.  
  
“Little Grace! Only you’re not so little any more.”  
  
“You were always littler than me.” Grace quipped affectionately, but still not quite breaking her stony, soldier’s mask.  
  
“God, it’s been so long.” Dani took a step back to survey her old acquaintance. “Oh it’s been, what? Four, five years? It’s so nice to see you again.”  
  
“That’s why I’m here.” Grace still affixed her penetrating gaze on Dani. Determination and emotion shone through her eyes, despite her stiff stance and icy expression.   
  
Commander Ramos was back in the room. Dani’s mind swam as she quietly padded back to her desk, buying time as she pretended to push papers.  
  
How many times had she been through this? There was no place for emotional attachments, and there was no room for personal judgements and feelings when the fate of humanity rested in their hands.  
  
Then again…  
  
What was more human than compassion? Love for your fellow man? If they denied themselves such a thing, how were they any different from the machines that hunted them?  
  
_ ‘You need the manpower’_ Commander Ramos reminded, _‘You need people like her on the force. You’d have sent her, before you learnt who she is.’_  
  
Dani chewed her lip. Was she about to send this woman to almost certain death? Could the potential for good outweigh the load on her conscience?  
  
“Have you really thought this through?” Dani forced her voice to sound sharp, strong.  
  
“Every day.” Grace cut in, not a moment of hesitation. “I owe my life to this battalion. To you, Commander.”  
  
“‘Dani’, please.” Dani begged, discomfited by the situation. At this stage she was nitpicking at a loss for how else to reply.  
  
“Yes sir.”  
  
Dani pressed her face into her hands in despair. When they said it was lonely at the top, they weren’t wrong. And who exactly were “they” anyway. How did they know her life?  
  
“Well Private. We’ll see what we can do.” Dani lied, sitting up straight. “We’ll be reviewing all the applications and let you know the verdict shortly.”  
  
Dani collected Grace’s file, laying it to one side. She would decide exactly how to handle this later. For now she needed to keep playing commander. And that meant locking up her emotions for a little while.  
  
“Wait, Grace.” Halfway out of the door, Grace span around obediently.  
  
“Will you… I mean when you get some time, please come and see me.”  
  
“You’re not in trouble. I mean, in a personal capacity.” Dani felt the need to clarify, upon seeing Grace’s expression.  
  
“Tea.” Dani was kicking herself inside for even beginning this dialogue. “Come for tea.”  
  
Grace’s cool blue eyes bored into her own.  
  
“I mean it’s not real tea, but it tastes alright. Better than water.” She cringed internally, feeling Commander Ramos silently disapproving.  
  
“Please come.”  
  
“Okay… Dani.” Grace finally offered a smile and made her way out.  
  
Dani flopped into her chair, equal parts elated and devastated. She let out a long-suffering sigh. Perhaps there was something else she could find. Put the young protege to good use without putting her in direct danger.  
  
She had soldiers left, right and centre. People everywhere she looked. But what she didn’t have, had never had, was the thing she needed the most. A friend. Maybe even—  
  
“Commander?"

That fucking door creaked open yet again.  
  
Commander Ramos flipped into action. Dani would have to wait.  
  
“Thanks Corporal. Bring him in.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This entire fic was meant to be from Grace's perspective, but Dani took the reigns on this one. Shh.


	5. The resolve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spotlight on Dani. Pushed to the edge, we begin to see her true colours bleeding through.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some important admin:
> 
> #1 - I’m switching chapters 2 and 4. Although I have joked about it, the order of the chapters was a tough decision, and ultimately I think swapping these two will make it more coherent and chronological to newcomers. Anyone who has partially read, and comes back to find the order has changed: I apologise.
> 
> #2 - I’m changing this fic from M to an E rating because of some later chapters. When I started writing I wasn’t sure how much explicit content I wanted to include, and the early chapters are fairly tame.   
As things have taken shape I debated if I needed to tone things down to fit the M rating, or whether I could move those parts into another document. Both of those have disadvantages, so I decided the simplest action would be to bump the rating.  
Ultimately T:DF is R rated (15 in the UK) so I figured my target audience can probably deal with a bit of adult content. If women falling in love and fucking isn’t your thing, I suspect this isn’t the literature for you.

As the sharp evening sun bore down on her, Dani Ramos raced through the teams of people at the migration camp. Navigating the impenetrable wall of humans was a whole battle in itself.

Her heart raced as she found her escape was completely blocked off. 

Nobody was moving. Everybody was too leisurely. Waiting. No rush. 

Did they have no sense of urgency? Didn’t they realise the stakes?

As she desperately tried to force her way through, Dani felt something catch on the jacket tied around her waist. 

It yanked her back, dragging her effortlessly even as she dug her feet into the dirt.

Dani’s panic set in, her fists clenching, ready for a fight to the death.

It grabbed out once she was in reach and clasped around her upper body - incapacitating her arms.

“Noooo!!!” Dani kicked back, launching her weight forward to throw off her opponent.

“Dani!” Grace’s voice rang out. 

Dani wriggled as she was lifted off the ground. 

She felt a pressure against the top of her head and twisted her neck to avoid the assault. 

“Stay still!” Grace finally fitted the baseball cap onto Dani’s unkempt head.

Successful at her mission, Grace released her grip on Dani. No sooner were Dani’s arms free, than the hat hit the floor. 

Catching their breath, they stood, facing one another. Dani swept back her hair victoriously.

Grace sent her a sharp look.

“Pick that up.”

Dani stared defiantly. Grace stare, unamused.

“Will you idiots grow up already?” Sarah brushed past them both, going on ahead. “I thought we were tryin’ to avoid attracting attention.”

Dani’s lip quirked as her stare cracked, and in a second they were both creasing up with laughter. 

Grace swept up the hat and fitted it back on Dani’s head, throwing her arm around Dani’s shoulders. 

Dani elbowed her firmly in the stomach, then wormed her arm around Grace’s back.

“Well, if you don’t want to wear it Grace, don’t. When your eyes burn out of their sockets, don’t say I didn’t warn you.” Dani teased.

“Who said that?” Grace replied drily, earning a playful squeeze.

Grace’s height and visibility gave her an advantage, and the crowds parted fluently as they hiked up towards the train tracks.

“Besides,” Grace continued. “Your safety is more imp—”

“Ugh, _safety_! that’s all you ever talk about.” Dani teased, but also pulled the cap deeper over her eyes.

As they’d agreed, everyone needed her to avoid the risk of recognition or recording. Anything which could give the Terminator a hint at their location. 

“Hey, can I get my pack? I want to buy some food.” Dani looked up to Grace, who squinted down and shouldered off Dani’s bag.

“You humans and your obsession with food.” Grace let Dani pull her along by the hand. 

“You cyborgs and your hypocritical facade of not needing to eat or sleep.”

Grace gave her a droll look, before looking up to survey the crowds.

“Hurry up, or Sarah’s going to blow a gasket.” She added, as Dani fiddled with her pack.

“Oh shh. We have plenty of time.”

They didn’t have plenty of time. By the time the pair had made it to Sarah Connor, the train was already approaching on the horizon.

The track side was packed, and people jostled on all sides to get closer to the edge.

Dani’s heart pounded at the excitement, forgetting for a moment the gravity of their situation, and simply absorbing the energy of the crowd. 

She felt a hand on the small of her back. 

“Ready?” 

Dani smiled back at Grace in reply.

As they boarded, Dani struggled to pull herself up to the roof, annoyed that Sarah and Grace had made it look so easy. 

Sarah watched Dani indifferently, while Grace was busy scanning the other passengers for danger. A grunt of frustration finally captured her attention.

“Oh, sorry Dani.” Grace pulled her up easily, letting her lay for a second catching her breath. “I forgot that you’re not… never mind.”

“An automated super soldier from the future?!” Dani panted, finding her feet.

“You’re in a good mood today.”

Dani brushed herself down, coming up to slip her arm around Grace’s.

“See anything?” Dani took in a deep breath. There was something so sweet about the twilight air, and the pink glow of the sky was making her emotional.

“Seems like the coast is clear. Hopefully this will give some breathing room before it tracks us.”

“Great, I won’t need this then.” Dani removed her baseball cap, returning it to Grace’s head.

She smiled sweetly before Grace could retaliate, and went to find a comfortable spot to settle down near Sarah.

By the time they were bored of playing cards and discussing their plans, the sky was deep blue, and the cold had begun to set in. 

Dani enjoyed listening to Grace’s slow breathing, feeling Grace’s warmth against her back. To be close with her felt like the most natural thing in the world, and it soothed her soul. 

“Grace?” Dani whispered, unsure if her companion was still awake.

“Mmm?”

“Can you tell me some stories? About the future? I want to know.” 

“You’re not tired?” Grace murmured against her hair.

But Grace acquiesced, and Dani gripped her hand all the tighter. Despite the rattling train and the cold metal, soon they both slept, comforted in each others’ presence. 

* * *

Dani dashed from wall to wall, swiping tears away from her face as they impeded her vision. 

She had to find them. 

Through the fencing of the detainee pen, Dani finally caught a glimpse of a familiar face. She shouted until her throat hurt, desperate to get Sarah’s attention.

As Sarah Connor was being led away, finally the cries were heard, and Sarah locked eyes with Dani.

Sarah only shook her head.

What did that mean?! Dani smashed her hands against the cage in frustration. Then lashed out again when she realised how helpless she was in here.

An enormous wave seemed to rise in Dani’s stomach, and she dashed over to one of the ‘waste’ buckets to be sick. 

Dani wiped her mouth and stood, disgusted and humiliated at herself.

Despite the overcrowded cage, Dani felt completely alone. For the first time, she was split up from her team-mates, split up from _Grace_.

An officer unlocked the cage door to call up one of the detainees. The crowd herded towards the door, everyone desperate to say their part to anyone who would hear it.

In the madness, Dani saw a space on one of the perimeter benches and found her way towards it. She felt numb. The sound, the sense of people brushing past her on every side. It was all muted.

Dani felt the loneliness bearing down on her, eviscerating her insides. She hated it. It made her feel weak.

She had spent her whole life taking care of herself and her family. How much had she valued her own independence - and now here she was - falling apart after spending a few hours apart from her friends.

Did she miss the protection, the guidance? Dani hated being coddled and condescended, and yet at the same time she missed that security, the safety of having people at your back, people who raised you up. 

So then who or what was Grace? How had this person, in the short time they’d known each other, come to be so important? 

Everything was there, from the very start. That intimacy, the bond, the trust, the mutual understanding. Where did it come from? 

Nobody had ever treated her that way, looked at her that way. There was something in those deep, sad eyes that made her lose herself and find herself all at once. Right now, that was the closest thing she had to ‘home’. And Dani was homesick.

Nothing Dani had felt before compared to this. She realised how little experience she had with these things. There had never been the time, never the interest to date or explore that side of herself, yet here it was, all unravelling. 

And now this. Could it really be over before it had begun? Had she lost her chance before she even had the opportunity to take it?

Her stomach clenched up again at the thought, a wave of panic washing over her. 

She counted slowly and tried to control her breaths. She swallowed tentatively, having no interest in going anywhere near that bucket again. 

“Pull yourself together, Dani” She spoke to herself, hoping that hearing her own encouragement would give her strength.

Dani’s mood didn’t exactly improve over the course of the next hour, but she gradually found herself less agitated and more contemplative. Gradually her mind wandered to the bigger picture. 

Were events fated, or did every choice make a difference? Was this the way it had always happened? Their lives stuck in a loop, past changing future, and future changing past. It seemed impossible.

So then who had she been, this person in the future? A Dani that had once existed and now never could exist at all. 

What had happened in her life? Was it better or worse than this? Did that Dani have a Grace too? 

The future she had learnt about seemed so bleak, unimaginable. Even Grace’s happiest memories sounded like nightmares.

How did she get drawn into all of this? Why did this all have to happen? For the crime of having some unborn, undefined child, her entire life had been ripped apart. She missed her home, her family.

Dani looked around, taking in her surroundings. All these people here. Normal people, living their normal lives, unaware of the reality of what would happen. They would lose their friends, families. How many of them would even live to see the future Grace described?

Dani sighed, looking down at her hands. She couldn’t live a life of passivity. 

She rejected that future. She would create her own— 

With no warning, an alarm blared out. 

Dani clasped her hands over her ears, a flood of fear electrifying her whole body. She knew the Terminator was here. There was no time.

She glanced around at all the faces - young, old, scared, innocent.

She understood what she needed to do. The fight against the future begun now. By saving these lives.

Whatever happened, she would never stop fighting. For them.

Dani stomped up onto the bench. Her roars commanding the attention of the frightened crowd. 

“¡Escuchen! Listen up! You’ll survive this, but you need to listen to me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hate time travel.


	6. The reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Commander Ramos takes a night off to catch up with an old friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long delay on this, this chapter took forever. You’re all perfect, patient humans. This chapter is a little longer and hotter than usual.

Dani wiped her hand down on her uniform feverishly. This was ridiculous. It was just dinner, this wasn’t life and death. Yet her sweaty palms betrayed her, and she rocked restlessly on her heels. 

For the dozenth time, the commander returned a salute to a passing officer. She felt so conspicuous here. This probably wasn’t the best place to be waiting around. After all, it was a Saturday night and the cramped streets were buzzing with other leisure-seekers.

She still marvelled at it all. For everything that had changed, humanity was fundamentally just the same as it always was. People providing makeshift services, consumers looking to unwind. Give people an inch of security and stability and they’d turn it into a society. Humans were reliable that way.

Another acquaintance approached and Dani finally had enough. She applied her social unction and slipped away casually.

Inside the bar, she breathed a sigh of relief. This was more relaxed. 

“Ramos.”

Dani’s head shot up as she approached the bar.

“To what do we owe this pleasure?”

Dani gave an exaggerated groan, grinning over at the bartender.

“I was hoping for some peace and quiet, Charlie.”

“Maybe you should have stayed at home then. You know, it’s not often we have a celebrity around these parts.”

“Oh, stop it. How's the leg?”

“Well, when they find the other half I'll let you know.” Charlie patted his prosthesis for effect.

“Fucking hell,” Dani laughed along darkly.

“Eh, you get used to it. How about you? Word was all over that you’d been blasted to smithereens. You’re looking pretty good for a dead woman.”

“It’s true” Dani barked a laugh, putting her index finger under her nose in the guise of a moustache. “_The rumours of my death are greatly exaggerated_. As they say.” 

“Very good.”

“So yeah, feeling back to normal pretty much. I mean, I’m not going to be on field for a while, but good enough to sit at a desk, you know.” Dani forced out a buoyant tone, disguising how thoroughly wearied she was with answering the same question in every single encounter. The concern was appreciated, but…

Charlie set down a pot in front of Dani.

“Well, this one’s on me.” He poured steadily from a glass bottle and recorked it.

“Can you make that two, actually?”

Charlie quirked a brow, doing a double-take and regarding her presentation. 

“Date night? Who’s the lucky guy?” Charlie poured out a second cup. “Or girl.” He added thoughtfully.

Dani cocked her head defiantly and lifted the cup to her lips.

“A _friend_.”

“Sure.” Charlie nodded in mock assurance.

“She’s an old friend.”

“Ah. nice.” Charlie wiped at the bartop with a rag. “Did you know her Before?”

“Oh, no. It was a little bit after that. I mean we met maybe thirteen or fourteen years ago, we’ve been friends for years.”

“Wow, nice. So you’re close?”

“Yeah… well, close as you can get with a SOFL at least.” Dani punctuated with a sad smile.

“Ah, shit.” Charlie winced. “She’s in spec ops?”  
  
“I know. There’s no dissuading her.”

“Well, even if you only see her now and then, you’re lucky to have someone you can get along with. Most of us are stuck with what we can get.”

“Oh right?” Dani barked out a laugh. “How’s the marriage working out for you, Charlie?”

“Don’t even go there.” Charlie grunted and sloped away to serve another customer.

Dani sunk her chin into her hand. She swilled around the fluid in her cup, letting the warmth of the alcohol sooth her nerves. She closed her eyes and let her mind wander.

“Ramos,” Charlie called from across the bar. “that your date?”

Dani’s head flashed towards the entrance. 

Grace lingered in the doorway, engaged in a greeting with some other patrons. Dani twisted around on her stool, watching the group.

Her eyes registered every detail. Grace’s fluid posture, her neatly pressed khaki shirt tucked into belted trousers. Dani watched her remove her cap and absently fidget with the back of her freshly cut hair. The group erupted in laughter and Grace extracted herself, her eyes flickering around the room before landing on Dani. 

Dani’s heart jumped when those blue eyes locked onto her. Grace’s expression melted into an warm smile as she made her way across the room. Dani turned back to sneak another drink. 

“Hey!” Grace laid her jacket on the bar and turned to her friend.

“Graaaaaaace.” Dani slipped out of her seat and straight into Grace’s arms.

Grace’s shirt felt cold from the outdoors, but Dani could feel her body heat permeating through the fabric. She filled her lungs with Grace smell and felt arms tighten around her torso in response.

“Nnn.” Dani groaned in discomfort, starting to break away for the sake of her ribcage.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I forgot.” Grace stared down “Are you alright??”

“Totally fine. You’re just too strong.” Dani took her seat again, close enough that her knees still brushed Grace’s sides. 

Grace leant in, prompting Dani to cross her legs. 

“Is this mine?” Her fingers clasped around the remaining cup on the counter. She took a drink, recoiling slightly at the taste.

“First lieutenant. Can I get you anything?” Charlie sloped over, casting a very loaded glance at Dani.

“Captain, actually. And this will be fine thanks.” Grace tipped her cup at the bartender with a smile. 

“Alright. Shout if you do.”

“Captain?” Dani repeated, turning away from staring daggers at the back of Charlie’s head. “When was this?”

Grace winced into her cup, not wanting the dampen the mood.

“Let’s talk shop another time Dani, we’re off the clock.” Grace cast a winning grin at Dani, who was gazing up at her with faint adoration. Grace swallowed, glad to have steered things away from discussing the death of her previous Captain.

“Okay. Well, congratulations!” Dani squeezed Grace’s hand. “Agh, it’s so good to see you.” 

They shared a long look, enjoying each other’s rare presence.

“Alright then! Where do you want to eat?”

* * *

Grace dawdled, shortening her step to keep to Dani’s pace. She watched Dani’s breath diffusing ethereally in the sharp night air.

Even though she put on a front of strength, it was obvious the commander was still recovering. Grace tried to pay extra attention; her enhancements were starting to put her out of touch with the normal limits of exertion for a human.

“You know, that was better than it looked.” Grace, finally breaking the silence as they both shivered against the wind.

“I know?! I don’t want to know what they put in it to make it taste that good.” Dani laughed leaning into Grace’s arm both for support and closeness. “We should go again sometime. When do you ship out?”

“Oh not for a week or two. Well, that’s what they said. I guess there’s no knowing if something is gonna come up.”

“Ugh, that’s no time.” Dani complained.

“It’s loads of time! A few days in I’ll be climbing the walls waiting for you to finish work every day.”

“Well, come with me then, you can be my secretary.” 

“I’d honestly rather wrestle a REV-8.” 

An awkward pause settled over the conversation. Grace felt a tug on her arm as Dani squeezed tight and they continued along the street sluggishly.

“How are you feeling? About the augmentation op?” 

“Great! Strong. It’s crazy actually, kind of the same, but different, you know?”

“Mmmm,” Dani buried her face in the arm of Grace’s coat. “No. That doesn’t make any sense.” 

Grace laughed along, shrugging her other arm out of her jacket.

“It’s exciting. It changes everything.” Grace offered her forearm to Dani, who began running her hand along the ridged scars.

“Well, it doesn’t make you invincible, you know.”

Grace tucked her exposed skin back into her jacket sleeve and smiled sadly down at Dani.

“Let’s not have this argument again, Dani.”

Dani rolled her eyes, but inhaled deeply as they trudged on.

“You’re right. We’re supposed to be celebrating!”

* * *

“I can't believe you have a window!” Grace bounded over to peer outside, watching the lights and figures visible in the courtyard below.

“I know! Finally!” 

The moonlight filtered in, not quite enough to reach the corners. Dani lit a few dim lights, bathing her room in an warm glow.

Dani sat down on the corner of her cot, loosening her boots and tucking them away. She glanced up, her eyes gravitating towards Grace.

The soldier leaned dreamily by the window, moonlight casting a perfect highlight over all her angles. Emboldened by the alcohol pooling in her stomach, Dani’s gaze stuck, frozen and uninhibited.

Grace’s shirt hung loosely from one finger, granting Dani full view of the expanse of skin at her nape, down to where her shoulder-blades stood proud around the racerback cut of her undershirt. 

Seam-like scars plunged down her thick arms, which flanked her sides and led down the curve of her spine to her neat backside.

Dani let herself entertain her thoughts for a moment more, before forcing herself to her feet. She rooted around in the cupboard, emerging with a bottle. 

At the sound of a muted crackle she looked over, observing Grace fiddling with the dials on her radio. 

“There’s usually at least one station, but they tend to be transient.” Dani pressed a glass into Grace’s hand and poured out a drink.

“I’ll take whatever I can get.” Grace’s efforts eventually paid off, and the sound of voices from an old music channel gradually came into focus.

“Hey, come over here.”

Grace followed Dani’s summon, over to where she waited at her desk. Dani picked up her glass and held it out towards Grace.

“Happy belated birthday.” Dani’s voice shone with affection.

“Cheers.” Grace touched her glass to Dani’s and they both washed back a mouthful of liquor.

“28. You’ve really come a long way.”

“Hey well, you were a commander at my age.” 

“It’s not a competition, I’m proud of you. Take a compliment!”

“Aww…” Grace averted her eyes with an embarrassed smile. 

Grace’s gaze wandered to the objects on Dani’s desk. Neat stacks of papers, schematics, notes.

Her fingertips traced the angular leaves of a plant, spilling proudly out of its pot. A few tiny buds sheltered along the stems, marking spots where flowers might soon bloom. 

“How do you keep this thing alive?” Grace wondered out-loud.

“It’s not difficult,” Dani laughed “I think it just didn’t enjoy living in a tin can in your backpack.” 

“So ungrateful.” Grace shook her head and grinned back. “Dig up your own wildflowers in future.”

“Aww, you’re right, it was the best half-dead seedling I’ve ever been given.”

Grace’s arm shot out to poke Dani between the ribs. She dodged it with a laugh and sunk down onto her bed, nursing her glass.

“Can I take a look at these?”

Dani hummed an approval and Grace reclined in the desk chair, examining a couple of reports from her tray.

Dani lounged back too, starting to fall into that comforting crevice between sobriety and incapacity.

She quietly wondered how it was possible for Grace to do even the most mundane things and look incredible. 

Here she was, sprawled in the chair, more rockstar than soldier, hunched up over a piece of paper and looking like a greek sculpture. And Dani loved that inside that rough exterior, the softest, sweetest woman she’d had the pleasure to know.

“Did you sign this off yet?” Grace looked over at her and Dani averted her eyes.

Dani groaned, feeling too relaxed to be discussing business. She reached forward and mimed for Grace to pass the report. Her eyes scanned down the document, recognising the proposal from earlier in the day.

“We don’t know enough about the environment for that type of manoeuvre.” Grace added, as Dani read.

“Yeah you’re probably right. I’ll take a look in the morning.” Dani got up to drop the paper on the desk. “Need a refill?”

Grace nodded and tipped her head back to finish her glass, before pausing with wide eyes.

“Mmmm!!” Grace vocalised excitedly, turning to Dani.

She slammed down her glass and twisted the dial on the radio to fill up the room with the bouncy introductory notes of the old-timey swing music.

Grace grabbed at Dani’s hands, pulling her towards the centre of the room.

“Let’s dance!”

“Ohh, nooo…” Dani’s bafflement turned to amusement as she protested weakly. She let her fingers weave through Grace’s and enjoyed the warmth of her other hand pressing into Dani’s hip. 

It was sloppy and disorganised, but Dani enjoyed the closeness and Grace’s infectious enthusiasm.

“This isn’t too much?” Grace asked softly after a few moments of gentle dancing.

“It’s perfect.” Dani rested her head against Grace’s chest, curling her arms around her waist.

As the song drew to a close, Grace lifted her chin off Dani’s head.

“I miss you.” Grace had meant to speak it softly, but her voice came out raw, emotional. 

There was nothing like a near-death experience to put things into perspective, and the two of them had had no shortage of those the past year. 

Slowly Grace was beginning to understand why Dani fought with her every time she returned to the forces. When Dani had been injured, Grace had felt like the whole world had been lost - and not only because Dani was the one who could save it.

But she couldn’t give up her responsibilities. All that was left was to enjoy the time they had.

“We need to hang out more.”

“We do.” Dani murmured against her chest.

“We need to be drunker.”

“Oh my god.” Dani pulled back, laughter shining on her face. “We absolutely do.”

* * *

“How did it get so late??” Grace was leaning up against the desk, blinking her eyes into focus and inspecting the dial on her wristwatch.

“We were at that second bar for hours.” Dani mused. “Excellent drinks though.”

Grace pulled a face. “If you say so.”

“Alright… well, better than this crap at least.” Dani shook the bottle at Grace, where a cloud of silt billowed up from the bottom, and turned the liquid a murky brown.

It wasn’t even funny, but they couldn’t stop laughing.

“Oh, go on, you’ve tempted me.” Grace held out her glass for a refill. 

Dani poured, the last the of the bottle emptying into Grace’s cup.

“That’s way too much!” Grace laughed, hooking her fingers into Dani’s belt loop to tug her back as she tried to escape.

“We’ve already had too much.” Dani retorted, letting herself be guided over to where Grace perched against the desk.

“Hey I’m really glad you’re here.” Grace kept her eyes fixed down, decanting half of her drink into Dani’s glass. 

She sighed, her hand still stuck on Dani’s hip, as though a magnetic force kept drawing it there.

“Guess what?” Dani lowered her voice conspiratorially. “I’m glad you’re here too.” 

“Dani…” Grace deposited her glass on the table and drew her eyes up. Dani found herself unable look away from those hypnotic blue eyes.

“…Do you think there's tension between us?”

“No.” Dani lied, as soon as her brain connected the question with the dark look on Grace's face.

“You don't feel it?” Grace’s hands pressed into Dani’s sides.

Dani’s eyes gave her away, blazing into Grace’s as she hid behind her glass, taking a deep drink. 

The firm grip on her hips loosened, as Grace stood up straight and extracted Dani’s glass from her fingers to set it down.

With no props between them, Grace slid her hands from Dani’s shoulders to her neck. 

“How about now?”

“Maybe just a little bit.” She whispered, gravitating inwards, watching those lips come dangerously close. 

The radio droned on in the background, punctuated by the sound of soft breaths and slow kisses.

Grace pressed her forehead into Dani’s, their bodies impossibly close, as though moving apart would break them.

“Is that a yes?” Their lips brushed, just so slightly, as she spoke. “Or a no.”

Dani fumbled to find the words. She was so rarely speechless, yet suddenly it was as though her mind had been wiped blank. All the years they had known one another; all the yearning, the fighting, and underneath all that, the embers of a romance. Simmering away, often stoked, but never permitted to flame.

Grace rubbed their noses together and kissed Dani’s cheek: a final offering before she pulled away. 

Dani only gripped her tighter, refusing for her reticence to be interpreted as a lack of interest.

“I just… What if—” She croaked, her words catching in her throat. 

“What if… you jump in front of a cluster bomb again? Or I do.” Grace weaved her fingers through Dani’s hair. “We’re alive now, right? Why shouldn’t we do what we want?”

“I want _you_.” Dani tilted her head forwards decisively. Their lips met in the facsimile of a kiss, but neither one could stop smiling.

Their hands shifted and wandered as they explored this novel dynamic between them. Years of pent up affection and frustration spilled over into every kiss and touch.

Dani’s mind roared with impatience. It felt as though her entire core was tugging towards Grace, begging her to be closer, deeper. Exactly _what_ she needed was unclear, but she needed it soon.

She rolled her palms down the curve of Grace’s back to rest on her backside. She felt Grace’s long arms wind around her and pushed her hips so far into Grace’s that the desk slipped back an inch.

Grace just smiled at her enthusiasm, angling her head to deepen the kiss and slide her tongue past Dani’s eager lips.

A buzz of excitement flashed outward from Dani’s centre and she impulsively slapped her palm against Grace’s left buttock.

Wide blue eyes blinked at Dani in disbelief.

“Oh. Is that how it is?” Grace challenged, rearranging Dani’s arms around her neck then squatting to lift her up.

Dani’s legs wrapped fluidly around Grace’s waist, and she drew her head in close to gnash her teeth by Grace’s ear.

Grace swore, the sound beginning to unravel the last dregs of propriety her brain had been clinging onto. She staggered over to Dani’s cot and pressed her into the mattress, their tongues battling for dominance.

Dani’s hands roamed on Grace’s arched back, freezing reflexively every time their disorganised movements generated friction right where she needed it.

Grace’s mouth made busy work of Dani’s neck - sucking, licking, and nipping her way, enjoying every flinch and moan she elicited. 

She propped up on one elbow, kissing her way along Dani’s jaw. Grace scanned her deep, brown eyes; her pupils wide and her lips flushed red from Grace’s attention.

“We should stop.” Grace peered down, the twinkle in her eye giving away her dry expression.

“What?” Dani tried to sit up, finding herself pinned.

“Well, we’re drunk.” Grace’s smooth smirk gave away her game, and Dani’s hands wound through her hair, tugging her down to meet her lips.

“We’re soldiers.” Dani caught Grace’s bottom lip between her teeth. “We’re always drunk.”

“Mmm.” Grace moaned, letting their tongues slide together again for one round. “Maybe we should wait?”

“Grace.” Dani’s hands held Grace’s face steady. “We’ve waited for a long time. So take your pants off so I can fuck you, okay?”

There was no more talking or teasing. They stole kisses in-between fidgeting with their belts and buttons.

Grace scrambled to the edge of the bed, yanking at her boot laces impatiently as Dani’s own pants crumpled to the floor next to her. 

She tugged one boot off as she felt Dani’s hands sneaking up her inner leg to unzip her fly. Grace tossed her shoe aside and focused on fumbling blindly with Dani’s shirt buttons, unwilling or unable to pull away from their kiss long enough to see.

Nimble hands tugged Grace’s trousers down, catching around her ankles where they met her other, forgotten boot. 

Grace pulled away, desperate to get free of her loathsome clothes. When everything was finally gone, she turned back to Dani on the bed.

“Off.” She commanded, hooking her finger under the band of Dani’s bra. 

Once discarded, Grace had to stop, becoming utterly enthralled by the sight and feel of Dani’s bare breasts. 

“Up here.” Dani tilted Grace’s chin upward, drawing her back into a deep kiss. Dani’s hands burrowed under her tank top, mirroring Grace’s hand movements against her own body.

Distracted with lustful energy, Grace didn’t think twice about reaching behind her head to whip off her undershirt. 

Dani sucked in a breath, unable to keep her hands from roaming, or her eyes from raking over every inch of Grace’s exposed body.

“Oh.” Grace glanced down, remembering her torn and tattered body, littered with scars and surgical incisions. “Should I keep it on?”

“No,” Dani frowned, “It’s not that. I’m just thinking… Do you have any idea how hot you are?” She smoothed her hands across Grace’s thick arms and wide shoulders, down to her chest and rippled stomach.

Grace shoved Dani back onto the bed with a grin and climbed on top, pressing Dani into the sheets. Dani squirmed beneath her. Even with full body contact they somehow felt too far apart. If she could melt into Grace’s skin, it wouldn’t be close enough. She needed more. 

Grace was everywhere with her hands and tongue, fuelled by a feverish energy compelling her to touch and taste. She felt Dani’s hand in her hair, bringing her up for another passionate kiss. Her other hand led Grace’s along a path down her front, guiding and granting permission at once.

The pair shifted a little to give Grace a better angle of access, and her fingers slipped beneath the waistband of Dani’s underwear. 

Grace’s fingers dove down, finding Dani’s heat and desire burning against her fingertips. She dragged her fingers forward, coating her vulva in that slickness, and feeling Dani’s stomach jump when she finally greeted her clit. 

“Show me what you like.”

Dani’s hand obliged, training Grace’s fingers in the motions and pressure that made her sigh and twitch. 

“Like this?”

“Yesss” Dani gasped in response, melting into the sensations of Grace’s deep kisses and deeper strokes.

As her fingers rubbed deftly back and forth, Dani began to feel herself becoming undone. So quickly! And yet there it was, her feet beginning to tingle and warmth building up from her centre.

“Keep… going…I’m…” Dani moaned around Grace’s tongue, then let herself give in to her orgasm, gasping and groaning with each fresh surge of pleasure running up her spine.

Grace planted wet kisses on Dani’s chest, listening to her heart pump harder with every twitch and cry, before slowing, marking her gradual comedown. Grace’s skin felt flushed with the excitement of being able to bring her partner to a pleasurable conclusion; it only ignited her own urgency for relief.

Dani sunk back against the bed at last, relaxing as Grace was littering adoring kisses up to her mouth.

“Ohh I needed that.” Dani wound her fingers through Grace’s hair to meet her eyes. “Your turn.”

Dani climbed on top as Grace leaned back, propping herself up on her elbows. 

Dani teased the waistband of Grace’s underwear and took her time sliding them down. As the elastic slipped off her leg, Dani flashed out her tongue to the arch of Grace’s foot, then draped kisses down her calf and thigh, drawing toward’s Grace’s core.

Grace’s long legs spread in anticipation and her head rolled to the side as Dani prowled closer, blue eyes tracking her longingly as she settled in between Grace’s thighs.

Dani slid a finger experimentally along Grace’s ripe lips, holding eye contact as her head moved down to replace her touch with a greedy tongue.

Grace heard her own cries bubbling up from her throat in response to the bold strokes of Dani’s hot mouth. It was beyond wonderful. Exquisite. It was—

Another whine caught in Grace’s breath as Dani drew slow circles around her, over and over. 

“That’s it.” Grace rasped in encouragement. She never wanted it to stop, but could feel her body starting to usher in her release.

Dani’s eyes stayed fixated on Grace’s face, drinking up the concentration and rapture that captured Grace’s features. Dani ran a curious fingertip around Grace’s entrance, revelling in the heat and sweet juices in abundance.

Grace began to squirm beneath her, and Dani felt her hips lift off the bed as she began to shiver and cry out. Dani let out a moan of her own in harmony, as she felt Grace’s body pulse against her tongue, and watched her abdomen tense with every throb.

As she began to calm, Dani laid gentle kisses against her clit. She pulled back to watch her finger sheath fully into Grace’s vagina, loving the visual and the silky heat enveloping her digit.

Grace’s hips rolled in protest, missing the contact and warmth of Dani’s mouth.

Dani’s eyes shot up, sparkling at the promise of another round, and she wasted no time finding her home between those thighs once again.

Grace was more energetic this time, unable to stop her hips from humping against that tongue that was giving her so much. 

Dani pushed and pulled with her sheathed finger, mapping Grace’s insides, marvelling at the involuntary twitch when she found exactly the right spot.

“Oh fuck, Dani.”

Dani’s heart sang at the sound of her voice playing on Grace’s lips. And even more-so when she felt a needy hand press into the back of her head, demanding more pressure.

Dani sunk her tongue deeper between Grace’s lips, the flat meat of her tongue devouring and encircling her again and again. 

Soft moans rang in her ears, begging for more of that perfect feeling. The double threat of internal and external stimulation beginning to barrel her over the edge once more.

Grace’s hips lifted yet again, signalling what was about to come, her tense body seeking relief.

As she hit her climax, Grace’s thighs clamped around Dani’s head, muting her desperate cries. Dani’s tongue lavished in the orgasm tearing through her partner, feeling the ripples and clenches around her finger as Grace was gratified.

Dani suckled gently, milking out the aftershocks as Grace still twitched and pulsed beneath her.

Graces hips still rocked against Dani’s mouth, legs unleashing Dani’s head from their grasp at last.

“Ahh, God that’s so good.” She panted, tongue shooting out to wet her lips. “Fuck. Don’t stop.”

Dani stopped with a grin.

“Let’s try something else.” She reached for Grace’s hands. “Get up.”

Grace scrambled up front of Dani, kneeling together and taking the opportunity to sneak a deep kiss from her lover. Dani lay back, pulling Grace down on top of her, before scooting down to nestle her head again between her legs.

“Ohhh” Grace relaxed her top half into the mattress, tentatively letting the weight of her hips rest against Dani’s eager face.

“Well, come and get it.” Dani growled, letting her hands roam Grace’s buttocks.

Grace rocked her hips experimentally, her clit leading her, urging to find its home in Dani’s mouth. She groaned into the pillows as she came flush with Dani’s inviting tongue, electrified at the sensations as she began grinding her weight against that warmth.

Dani adored the effects she was able to elicit from her partner. The thrill of her helpless begging, from a woman usually so fiercely independent. And now here she was, crying out and thrusting against Dani’s tongue like it would kill her to stop.

Dani’s hands glided against the backs of her slick thighs, where sweat formed and dripped against her flushed skin. Grace’s whole body was hot, burning up. Her movements were becoming frantic and unmeasured, as she found herself sprinting towards that glorious, sweet finish. Almost within reach.

Dani heard her gasp in a breath and hold it, and understood that Grace was close. She held on as tightly as she could, helping Grace to find the friction she needed to claim her reward.

With one final jerk, Grace unwound, crying and biting against her pillow as pleasure ripped through her body like bolts of lightning.

Dani could only hold her and wait, drinking in the sounds and movements her lover couldn’t restrain, as she rode out every last wave of orgasm, relaxing and tensing in slowing cycles.

When confident it was all over, Dani shimmied out from underneath Grace’s loose body. Sitting up, she filled her lungs with fresh air, and wiped off her mouth, before glancing down at where her partner had collapsed.

“Are you asleep?” Dani wondered, crawling up Grace’s still body to rest on her shoulder.

Grace’s face was still buried in the pillow, but she cracked an eye open, a tiny smile crooking the corners of her mouth.

Dani smiled too, pressing a kiss to Grace’s sweaty cheek.

“Are you okay?”

Dani rested her head on Grace’s shoulder, cuddling into her and running her nails softly against Grace’s back.

“Worn out already? What happened to ‘enhanced stamina’?” Dani wondered after a while, gently massaging Grace’s head under the mop of sweaty blonde hair.

This time Grace was able to roll over, lifting her head to face Dani.

“I don’t think they run diagnostics against multiple orgasms.”

Dani’s eyes shone as she laughed in relief and peppered light kisses to Grace’s lips.

“It’s not good enough. It’s a key requirement.”

“I’m sorry…” Grace pulled back from another long kiss, to focus her eyes on Dani’s. “I’ll make it up to you.”

“Definitely. We’ll have to make sure I’m all finished before you have your fun next time.”

“Next time.” Grace echoed, a huge smile washing across all her features. She reached around to find the covers and bring Dani closer, weaving their limbs together and cuddling into her chest.

“Grace, I…” Dani brushed golden hair off Grace’s forehead, feeling her stomach clench and leap at the intensity of the emotions pooling in her mind. This woman was everything to her. Could _have_ everything Dani owned and more.

“Nothing,” Dani leant in to kiss her lips. “I’ll tell you later.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Normal writers**: Oh their first time is so tender and sweet. So soft and gentle, loving, cuddly, caring, cute.
> 
> **Slifer**: SPANKING, TEASING, _FACE FUCKING_
> 
> Okay, again, sorry this took so long. I was starting to get some confidence with writing because the past few chapters were so smooth and easy. Well, it must have been beginner’s luck because this one really hit me with a sucker punch. There was so much material I wanted to use and that made it even harder to get things to flow. It’s easier to write from scratch than it is to write around all these existing scenes you want to fit together. I also vacillated about the tone and execution. There’s so much tragedy and sadness around their relationship, but at a certain point that just becomes bland and angsty to me. These guys are best friends, they have fun together, and I wanted to keep that at the core of their dynamic.
> 
> p.s. please nobody go back and compare with Calm Before the Storm because my vocabulary is so smol, all my porn recycles the same words a zillion times.


End file.
